Mom Doesn’t Like Waitress So She Gets Really Gross With Her Revenge

Just a few days ago, I blogged about a restaurant that banned children under the age of five from dining in their establishment. Most people felt that they had the right to make that decision, but a few people cried “age discrimination” and thought it was a horrible idea. Well, in case you need convincing that some parents should not be allowed to bring their children into a restaurant, I want you to meet Brooke.

Brooke went to eat dinner at Charlie and Jake’s Brewery in Melbourne, Florida and had the “worst experience of her life eating at any restaurant.” It was so bad that she felt the need to go to their Facebook page and leave them a 1-star review. Brooke means business, y’all. First she was upset that they seated her and her three children in a small corner where the most people were. Ummm, Brooke. If you and your children are only comfortable eating in a private dining room, maybe you should see if your home has one. Most houses do. Then she was mad that the food took “foreverrr” which we all know probably meant it took just as long as it did for anyone else. She was most upset that the waitress kept talking to her even though her baby was screaming. Yes, screaming. Meanwhile, the waitress was probably all, “Let me just tell this woman the specials so I can go wipe the blood from bleeding ears.” Brooke also says that she doesn’t care about the menu which we all know probably meant that she was going to order whatever she wants, menus be damned! Finally, Brooke says she will never go back again.

Cue the staff at Charlie and Jake’s Brewery breathing a collective sigh of relief.

When I called Brooke out for leaving a 1-star review even though it seemed that her own baby was the crux of the issue, she expanded her review and said that the waitress came back a “million times” to see if she was ready to order. (Customers just love to exaggerate, don’t they? A million times? Really? I’d be surprised if she even came back three.) According to Brooke, it should have been obvious to the waitress that her hands were full with a screaming baby. Meanwhile, every customer was wishing that Charlie and Jake’s Brewery had instituted a “no kids allowed” rule.

Brooke, Brooke, Brooke. The restaurant will not miss you or your screaming offspring. It’s fine. They will survive. But then Brooke admitted one more thing. She is not ashamed to post on Facebook that she enacted a type of revenge that only a disgusting human being would think to do: she smeared a poopy diaper in the bathroom. Yes, because she was upset with the waitress for trying to do her job and take a food order, Brooke thought it was a good idea to take fecal matter out of her baby’s diaper and smear it in the bathroom. Truth be told, we can only assume the poopy diaper was that of her baby. It is quite possible that Brooke was in some type of adult diaper situation and the poop came from her own diaper. We will never know, but wherever the poop came from, it’s wrong.

I like to use this blog to point out when a customer does something they should not be doing in a restaurant and I think we can all agree that smearing shit all over the wall of a restroom is definitely bad behavior. Brooke, you sound lovely and I’m sure you are setting a wonderful example for your three children:

“Okay, kids, whenever something happens that you don’t like here’s what you do: you reach into your diaper, a nearby toilet or even stick your finger up your own butthole if you have to, and you get yourself a handful of poop. Dog poop will work too, but human poop is always better. Once you get a real good amount into your palm, you rub it onto the wall. Billy, are you paying attention to me? I am teaching you a life lesson, son. Okay, anyway, you smear that poop all over the wall and then when you get home you write about it on Facebook so everyone in the world will know how disgusting you are. Got it? Now give your Mama a kiss, but let me wash my hands first. Oh, never mind. It’s just poop.”

26 thoughts on “Mom Doesn’t Like Waitress So She Gets Really Gross With Her Revenge

  1. Rachel

    Oh my gosh, I am laughing so hard at your words about how she may have been in an adult diaper situation and then your words about her possible lecture with her children telling them to pull poop out of their butt hole. I peed my pants a little bit.
    I’m sorry if you’re getting annoyed at my comments referencing common occurrences during my nursing career but I do have to say I once had a patient going to the bathroom and I went to check on her and her entire hand and arm up to her elbow were caked with rockhard shit and she had clearly stuck her hand possibly elbow deep up her butt hole to perform some sort of horrifying digital disimpaction. I was absolutely horrified and probably screamed without meaning to “WHAT are you doing!?” She said that she was constipated. I can’t make this shit up. I brought her a little barf pan and surgical scrub and a toothbrush and told her that she needed to thoroughly scrub under her fingernails to get all the shit off. She kept reaching her hand out to me as if she wanted to stroke my hair with her shit hands. I am permanently scarred from this experience

  2. Ash

    It’s almost like a BREWERY isn’t the best place to take your three young children. Including a BABY. Weird.

    Makes me think of that line in Sweet Home Alabama. “You’ve got a baby!! …. in a … bar?”

  3. MelissaWonderchilld

    Brooke sounds just like the kind of person I want raising the next generation (sarcasm intended). Who better to instill values than a clearly self-absorbed hothead who hasn’t yet grasped the concept that the world does not evolve around her. And why doesn’t Charley and Jake’s have a “nobody under 21” policy? It’s a brewery! That means their primary function is to make and sell beer, which kids under 21 cannot consume. Why on Earth would “Brooke” think the establishment should roll out the red carpet for her larvae, when in a more civilized age she would have been dealing with DCF (child protective services) for even bringing her kids in such a place? I mean, HOW DARE society expect “Brooke” to hire a babysitter if she wanted to frequent a brewery? (Insert your favorite “kids are the future” cliche here). I bet this poor server put the kids in the corner table because she perceived the irritation of the other patrons (who, most probably unlike “Brooke”, tipped well….) and catered to their needs instead of this narcissist mother who apparently believes it’s her God-given right not to have to wait until her kids are old enough to stay with a sitter to start frequenting an establishment that primarily serves booze, and expects the establishment to scrape and bow to her because “kids are the future”. If I were the manager I would have called the law on her for the crappy diaper episode (in Florida, the crime is called “criminal mischief” and is the same offense as graffiti) so she could sit in jail thinking about whether or not it’s time to grow up and have her kids put in foster care (where honestly it sounds like they would be better off!).

  4. Hillary

    What a fucking moron. Excuse my French.1 waitress did her job this chick was gonna complain no matter what ex: if she didn’t come back fast enough! It took so long for your food because u wouldn’t order! And if you have three kids you should be able to belt out your order mid baby scream😂. Unbelievable.. She sounds like a real moron😒

  5. Abbie McKnight

    Last week our hostess went into the men’s room to find someone had pooped in the trash can! Why are these people allowed to reproduce??

    1. Marlee

      My mom worked at a department store once that had two floors and someone someone shit right outside the elevator door, tracked it into the elevator, got it EVERYWHERE, and the upstairs smeared it all the way down the walls of a long hallway to the bathroom, where they made an even bigger mess. What’s worse is that the store did not have a cleaning crew, and the associates were responsible to clean it up, and she happened to be the one in charge that day. I realize people have accidents, but to do that to another person isn’t human, it’s being a damned animal. Hell, my animals exhibit better behavior than that!

  6. Clarissa

    There should be some type of fine or legal recourse for people who do this disgusting type of thing, especially for those who actually are dumb, disgusting, and self righteous enough to admit to smearing shit on someone’s property. I really can’t believe they just get away with this when someone else has to clean it.

  7. Whipper

    Please don’t use Brooke as the yardstick for all parents. Brooke is a douche canoe. I’m a mom. I’m having my 5th. I’m married to a restaurant manager, but that doesn’t really matter. No matter what career either of us had pursued, we’re trying damn hard to raise decent human beings. 95% of the time they’re civilized and we can take them anywhere and they’re model citizens. 95% of the time we also get the side eye glare because people assume we’re Brooke.

    1. Melissa

      Yes, I picture myself with my 6 month old and my 9 year old. People judge and don’t want to sit near you. But if my baby was the least bit fussy at a restaurant, the worst would be me standing at the table, with her in a mai Thai wrap, me eating chicken wings over her head. My baby is very difficult and high demand, but we’ve managed. Its sad people hate on kids and families when we gotta eat too. And most of us know how to handle our fussy children and if I couldn’t handle it that night, I’d get take out!

  8. Sherry Elsbernd

    I would hope since she posted what she did on their FB page, that the restaurant would use that with the police to press charges for destruction of property or vandalism or something.

  9. Tim Simon

    I don’t care how misogynistic this sounds…WHY IN THE FUCK is it seemingly always women who lose their mind and do batshit stuff like this over the TINIEST perceived slight?

    1. Jessica

      I had a man once throw his burger at me because he said no mustard and it had mustard so like maybe don’t make it a gender thing?

      1. Scott

        While I agree that crazy has no gender, your comparison misses the point. Throwing food is a dick thing to do and indicates rage issues, but using shit to get revenge (ineffectively since the dishwasher or busboy probably had to clean it up) reflects not just rage but actual mental illness.

    2. Lindsay

      Tim, quite simply because it’s assholes who knock them up and bounce to raise their devil spawns.
      Brooke is bat shit crazy- but it’s men that do most of the raping and murdering in society… so…..
      I digress, Brooke is gross and needs to stick to the drive-thru.

      1. shesajackal

        “Here’s the difference, to me, between boys and girls: Boys fuck things up; Girls are fucked up. That’s the difference. Boys just do damage to your house that you can measure in dollars, like a hurricane. Girls, like, leave scars in your psyche that you find later, like a genocide or an atrocity… That’s the difference between boys and girls. And it becomes the difference between men and women, really. A man will, like, steal your car or burn your house down or beat the shit out of you, but a woman will ruin your fuckin’ life. Do you see the difference? Like, a man will cut your arm off and throw it in a river, but he’ll leave you as a human being intact. He won’t fuck with who you are. Women are nonviolent, but they will shit inside of your heart.”


    3. Clair

      She has three kids. One a baby. Her hormones aren’t probably out of control on top of her most likely always being a nasty human being. She should have gone to a shrink. It a restaurant

  10. Jenna

    Therefore she let her baby sit there in a shitty diaper until she felt as though she wanted to change it. Shitty momma if you ask me.

  11. Alack

    Some people are just disgusting. We had a woman crap on the bathroom floor because we wouldn’t give her a free baked potato. Like, come on. That’s just nasty.

  12. Kathy

    This JUST happened at our restaurant in Atlanta. Our key employee went in to do a routine TP fill and sink wipe, when much to her chagrin, she found shit graffiti EVERYWHERE in the women’s room. Beyond repulsed!!! What type of animal even does this?? We have a few elderly customers, but c’mon! Even explosive shit doesn’t get on the walls. We are now going to keep Vicks vaporub handy for these times like the CSI people do for the stinker dead bodies. Really nice where food is served.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *