Over 35 and Still Waiting Tables? Cosmo Doesn’t Like That

I cannot be certain, but I think Cosmo magazine just insulted people who wait tables over the age of 35. In an article called “15 People Share the Most Important Lesson They Would Tell Their Twentysomething Selves,” one valuable piece of advice is this:

Don’t be a waiter forever, maybe? Restaurant work is for the birds. It will kill your social life, family life, and destroy your body. Find a job that doesn’t involve so much sacrifice for such shit wages. Although, I would argue that my waitressing experience taught me a lot about perseverance, hard work, and how to treat other humans with respect, so you know.

Fuck you, Cosmo. (The magazine, not the drink.)

Granted, that piece of advice supposedly came from someone who was giving her younger self some pearls of wisdom, but what’s wrong with waiting tables forever, Cosmo? Are you trying to make those of us who are still waiting tables in our 40’s, 50’s and 60’s feel like worthless humans? I know, I know, Cosmo didn’t specifically write that tip and it came from a reader, but by publishing it, isn’t Cosmo standing behind the idea that waiting tables after a certain age is something to be ashamed of? Laura Beck, who curated the list, you can do better!

When did waiting tables kill my social and family lives? As far as I can tell, I have quite the healthy social life and the only reason my relationship with my family is less than ideal is because most of them live 1500 miles ways. That isn’t my job’s fault. And waiting tables doesn’t necessarily destroy your body either. In my opinion, it keeps me moving and in the words of Sally O’Malley, “I’m 50! And I like to kick. Stretch. And kick.” (Okay, I’m 16 months away from being 50, but my body is nowhere close to being destroyed.)

Molly-I'm-50-2kick

The only way my body will be destroyed by waiting tables is from grazing too many french fries and sneaking too many cocktails. Besides, would Cosmo rather I sit at a desk all day until I experience sever muscle atrophy and get carpal tunnel syndrome?

Cosmo does offer some good advice in their list. No one will argue that staying in school is a bad idea or that you shouldn’t start saving your money. I just take issue with the fact that an older version of someone is telling their younger self to quit waiting tables as if it’s the worst thing that could happen in one’s life. Lots of people over the age of 35 choose to wait tables for a variety of reasons:

  • The hours are flexible and it allows you to be home when your kids get home from school.
  • You don’t have to take your work home with you.
  • The money is usually better than working in a retail environment.
  • If you need time off, you just get someone to cover your shift.

Maybe Cosmo could have added one more piece of advice from me:

Learn to enjoy what is happening in the moment and don’t get caught up in how others perceive success. If you are still waiting tables when you’re 48 years old or older, it must mean that there is something about it that works for you. Accept it, embrace it and be happy with your life.

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