Just Pay the Damn Check
You know, I don’t give a shit who pays for the fucking check. It does not matter to me (or any other waiter) who paid last, who owes whom, who’s …
August 19, 2009
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Category: restaurant
August 19, 2009
Babies suck
So many mothers have this sense of fucking entitlement like she is the first woman to ever push a baby out of her Sweet Potato Pie Hole. It’s been happening …
December 27, 2008
Do waiters really spit in food?
Yes, Virginia, waiters really do spit in food. But you have to be a really bad little girl to have that happen to you, so most people are okay. I …
December 26, 2008
Read the menu, asswipe
Sometimes people think that when they come into the restaurant they are in their own kitchen and I am their personal chef for the day. No bitch, that is not …
December 24, 2008
Diet Coke or Diet Pepsi…who cares?
This lady sat in my booth yesterday and ordered a Diet Pepsi. I told her “oh we only have Diet Coke, is that okay?” thinking that of course it would …
December 22, 2008
What is that smell??
Have you ever been in a restaurant enjoying the company of good friends and savoring the taste of food that was made just for you when you are suddenly overcome …
December 22, 2008
We are not a Starbucks
I have noticed lately that more and more people feel perfectly fine bringing in their own cups of coffee to my restaurant. Do they not get how incredibly rude that …
December 17, 2008
Hungry people suck
Not only do I have the joy of serving food in a restaurant, sometimes I get to do it as a cater waiter. The best thing about these gigs is …
December 16, 2008
Yes, the coffee is hot, bitch
I don’t know what it is with old people, but I hope when I am old (in like six years from now) I don’t lose my taste buds. I guess …
December 14, 2008