In a post called Sad Unwanted Child at Booth 16, I described the scene as two parents seemed to be giving much more attention to their newborn baby than the five year old boy who was also a part of the family. It was oddly satisfying for me to see some parents who cared about their child as little as I do, yet sad at the same time. The comment section turned into a debate about breastfeeding for some reason, but one comment stood out on its own. Ashley had this to say:
I do care about babies. Why are most of the servers on here mostly complaining? I for one love my job, even the assholes. They show me that my life may not be perfect, but at least I’m happy. The fact that the other child was described as neglected, I would have called child services.
Ashley, most of the servers on this site who complain are here for that very purpose. It’s called The Bitchy Waiter, you know? I am happy you love your job and how wonderful for you that whenever you see an asshole it reminds you to be happy. Whenever I see an asshole I just think of anal bleaching, but that’s just me. As for your thought that you would have called child services in the case of the neglected child, I think that’s a great idea. Maybe it would go something like this:
Child Protective Services: Child Protective Services, can I help you?
Ashley: Umm, yeah. I’d like to report a child that needs protectiveness because he is, like, totally being all disrespected and shit and totally neglected
CPF: Alright and your name?
A: Um, I’m Ashley and I will be your server today.
CPF: Thank you, Ashley. And where is this child right now?
A: Um, he’s at Table 16.
CPF: Table 16?
A: Yeah, in my restaurant. He’s at Table 16 and his parents are being all rude to him and ignoring him. Like they are all drooling over their new baby and this kid is not getting any attention whatsoever and it’s like totally sad and bumming me out.
CPF: And what is the child doing right now?
A: Eating macaroni and cheese.
CPF: Eating macaroni and cheese?
A: Yeah, but they ordered it without bacon and it’s way better with bacon and I think that’s gotta be like some kinda child abuseness so you’d better send some foster parents over here right away.
CPF: So let me understand: the child is in a restaurant and eating macaroni and cheese with his family?
CPF: And you think the parents are paying more attention to their other child?
CPF: And you called Child Protective Services because you feel this is a case of neglect.
A: Yeah. So when will the foster parents get here, because my shift is over in about an hour?
CPF: Miss, I don’t think this is a severe case of neglect.
A: Well, he was sitting under the table all alone for like ten minutes.
CPF: That’s not really neglect.
A: Well, did I mention that they ordered his mac and cheese with no bacon?
CPF: Yes, you did.
A: Well, I rest my case then. And his shirt looks dirty and he looks like he needs to blow his nose. And I think they’re gonna use a coupon and that tells me that the parents are cheap and therefore more than likely not buying this kid any toys.
CPF: Does the child look like he has been beaten or does he seem afraid of his parents?
A: I can’t tell right now, he’s playing with an iPad. As soon as he puts it down, I’ll go look and see if I can find any bruises.
A: You can call me Ashley.
CPF: Ashley, this child does not seem in need of our services.
A: Really? Cause it’s like the parents like the other kid way better and I just wanted to do my part to help the children. I do care about the babies.
CPF: I’m hanging up now, Miss.
A: You can call me Ashley.