Baptist Preacher Explains How to Avoid a Gay Waiter

As many of you know, I don’t take kindly to people who can’t accept the sexuality of someone else and feel the need to denounce that person for being gay. I especially don’t like it when this vile hatred comes from someone who is swaddled in a blanket of Christianity and living in a dream world where they believe God thinks it’s okay to hate other people.

Case in point: an asshole named Adam Fannin who is the pastor of Jacksonville Stedfast Baptist Church in Florida. His church is part of a network of the Fundamentalist Baptist churches founded by another asshole named Donnie Romer. Donnie is a preacher who pretty much celebrated when dozens of people were shot to death in the Pulse nightclub shooting in Orlando. What we have here are two separate assholes. In my 30+ years of being an out gay man, I have had a lot of experience with assholes, but I want to really focus in on one particular asshole today and give that asshole my full and undivided attention. The asshole that will get that focus is Adam Fannin.

This week in his sermon, he wanted to share with his flock his advice on how to avoid a gay waiter:

I dunno, I guess he didn’t feel like talking about 1 John 4:7 that says, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.” Or perhaps he didn’t want to repeat last week’s sermon when he used Romans 12:10 that says, “Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” And surely he forgot about Proverbs 10:12 that says, “Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all offenses.” Instead, he was inspired by something that didn’t even come from the bible and said, “If I ever go to a restaurant and you sit down, and then here comes this flaming foo-foo fruit loop, right? And you’re like, ‘Oh great. I’m here to have date night, enjoy some time with my wife, and I can’t… because of the lisps, I can’t even,’ you know.”

Yeah, he’s talking about how awful it is to have a gay waiter.

He goes on to explain that you should look around for a “lady that looks like a mom” and a “very diligent worker” and ask that person to be your server instead. Because, not only is it wrong to have a gay waiter serve his food, he also needs it to be presented by a woman who looks like a mom. (And what the fuck does a mom look like anyway?) He at least encourages his sheeple to tip well, but only so that the “foo-foo” will know what he missed out on.

There are so many things wrong with this fucking sermon and I don’t know where to begin.

First off, what the hell does this have to do with church and the bible anyway? There weren’t any fucking waiters in Jerusalem serving Jesus as he was downing dollar chicken wings and slamming back Bloody Mary’s at brunch. It’s just another way for the fundamentalist Christians to throw a little more hate into the already fueled fire. Stick to the Bible, asshole.

Secondly, who cares if the server is gay and how does he even know the server is gay in the first place? Does Adam Fannin have an innate Gaydar or did his server come to the table dressed like Liza Minelli with some fully extended jazz hands? And does he think if he eats food that was handed to him by a gay person that his sexuality is going to switch over and he will find his spouse completely repulsive and disgusting? (“Welcome to my world,” says Adam Fannin’s spouse).

Thirdly, why is this okay? Why is this not considered hate speech? Oh, wait, because we have the First Amendment in this country that gives us the right to free speech. Okay, that’s cool. He can say it and more power to him, but it goes both ways, so now I get to say whatever I want.

Fuck you, Adam Fannin. I don’t know what happened in your life to make you hate certain people for absolutely no reason, but it disgusts me. And what’s even more disgusting is that you are in a position to teach and share, but you have decided to abuse that power and try to persuade others to accept your hateful bigotry. My hope for you is that one day, you are in need and the only person who can help you is a gay one. Maybe you think a gay person isn’t good enough to hand you a plate of fucking baby back ribs, but I bet if the only person who could save the life of your child was a gay man, you’d take that help as eagerly as a hungry bottom at a bukkake party. Gay people are all around you, Adam, and there may have been one in your church that morning who listened to your sermon and now feels like shit about their life. You can’t avoid gay people because we are everywhere. I can assure you that gay people have served your food, fixed your car, bagged your groceries, flown your airplane, cut your hair and I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them even touched your penis once when you were in some random bathroom stall somewhere and you thought no one would ever know about it. Stop worrying about how to avoid a gay waiter and start figuring out how you can find the love in your heart that you think Jesus put there. You’re a dick.

By the way, everyone, here is their Facebook page. Tell them Bitchy Waiter sent you!

Or send them an email!

27 thoughts on “Baptist Preacher Explains How to Avoid a Gay Waiter

  1. Nance

    Why are people so horrible? If my server headed over to my table “dressed like Liza Minelli with some fully extended jazz hands” I would know that my dining experience was about to become one fucking bad ass experience. I would be delighted. Fuck Adam Fannin.

    Reply
  2. Chrystal

    This is the kind of douche canoe who, if he requested me to serve him & his family, I would in no uncertain terms tell him to go fuck himself.

    Reply
    1. Becki

      I just had to tell them how I feel about their ridiculous hatred! Hope they listen…who am I kidding we know they can’t hear me…I’m any other hated group or just a woman. Lol dumb MFRS! Luv to all happy holidays…our regs tip good this time of year! Here’s to you !💋💗😉

      Reply
  3. Just A Poor Server

    To this day, I will never understand why religious people continue to spread hate. That’s the exact opposite of what we’re supposed to be doing. No one says you have to agree with their choices. No one is saying you have to go to Gay Pride and show support. No one is forcing you to accept it, but these are human beings and deserve to be treated with the same respect you give anyone else. The fact there are anyone in the world that consider what happened at Pulse a good thing sickens me.

    This is part of the reason why I am not as religious as I was. I still believe in God, but I question how others of my faith treat other people. It’s ridiculous.

    They also tend to gloss over the fact that eating bacon is a sin, wearing certain fabrics is a sin, shaving is a sin. These are all in the bible and are considered wrong, but we tend to move past that and focus on this.

    I pray that one day we’ll be accepting of each other despite it all, but that’s not likely to happen anytime soon. I can dream though.

    Reply
    1. Phil McCracken

      Only for Jews is any of those a sin. Maybe next timer actually know what you’re talking about veggie you open your cake-hole. And I feel certain putting your dick in another man’s ass is right up there with shaving on the sin-meter.

      Reply
      1. Duh

        Since Christians teach from the bible, and thoes things are a sin in the bible, wouldnt that make them sunful for Christians to do? Or do you get to pick and choose which rules to follow? 🤔

        Reply
  4. Borb Chnadler

    Adam probably has some fake ID that allowed him to vote for Roy Moore today. He’s got to support his fellow child molesters/deviates! Adam’s first time was probably in an outhouse with the family’s cocker spaniel. Adam’s probably up to something, either some gay meth sex, or underage molestation, I hope it comes to light soon and scatters his ignorant followers to the wind!

    Reply
  5. L. Coin

    Well-said, sir. Very well-said. Creatures like this give true Christians (you know – those folks with the outrageous notions of loving thy neighbor, helping those in need, etc. etc. etc.) a bad name.

    Reply
  6. P.Simmons

    how can people think this is ok, just because you put in under the “blanket” of being a christian. He wouldn’t know what being a christian was if it dick-slapped him in the face!!!

    Reply
  7. Bluebell

    I get that people find his hatred unacceptable. But what I’m reading back is pure hatred in return, with swearing to boot. You’re no better.

    Reply
    1. Courtney

      Oh no they’re swearing! You’re right, I can’t see how that’s any better than hating a group of people , and attempting to lead your flock down the same path of bigotry. Damn!

      Reply
    2. Joe Mama

      You’d probably swear a lot too if you had a large segment of society constantly telling you that you’re an evil pervert who doesn’t deserve any rights. I mean look at this preacher… he thinks that he should be able to go anywhere he wants and not have to be in the presence of a gay person.

      Reply
  8. JD Young

    I think i am about to make a video on how to avoid homophobic preachers and mail it to his stupid ass. You know the funny thing is it seems that all of these “Christians” who judge 9 times out of 10 have a hot boy stashed away somewhere.

    Reply
  9. Joe Mama

    Typical hate preaching fundie Christian A-hole. Who cares if your server is gay or not? When I go to a restaurant, I go there to eat food,not have sex with the people who work there.

    I really think the good pastor is afraid that he might be attracted to someone he knows is gay. I’m not saying that the more someone preaches against homosexuality the more closeted they are, but you know it happens a lot. Look at Ted Haggard.

    Reply
  10. Kim

    I didn’t watch the video….I can’t watch it because I cannot live with such hate in my life. It really effects me and it hurts so much that they people we walk around are so awful. I just can’t take the hate anymore.

    Reply
  11. Christine

    OMG, when I responed with an “amen” I was in no way doing that for the pastor. I was trying to say I support anyone saying hate is JUST wrong. If anyone is using the Bible to hurt someone, then you are using it wrong!.

    Reply
  12. Annie

    Why aren’t his superiors notified of this bigotry, and with any luck, firing his homophobic behind?

    I was dumbfounded to read that he leads a church in Florida. The south, I can understand, but Florida? (Or is the dear misguided minister originally from a southern state? That would be my guess. He didn’t just become an intolerant, bigoted homophobe all at once.)

    Reply

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