When you have waited tables as long as I have, you learn a few things other than how to rattle off the names of ten draft beers and seven salad dressings. There is a strong learning curve when it comes to serving and very often we are only told what we should do in order to be a good server. However, this is a list of things that smart servers don’t do and I think it can help us all lead better lives as we take orders and wear aprons.
Smart servers don’t:
- Let their customers make them cry. It’s not worth it. A horrible customer is only in your life for 45 minutes and after they leave, you will probably never have to see them again. We can’t control their behavior, but we can control how we react to it. Let them be assholes and get out of your section as quickly as possible. The last time I let a customer make me cry was in November of 2011 and after it happened, I thought “never again.”
- Have their Facebook profile public or have their job listed on it. Don’t do it. The last thing you need is for some vengeful customer who was upset that they didn’t get enough tater tots to look you up on the Internet. If your place of business is listed on your profile then you have to watch what you say about your bad day at work. Lock down your profile and rest easy.
- Disrespect the kitchen or BOH. Let’s be honest, the kitchen staff can make your life a living hell. They are working hard for an hourly wage and when the place is slammed and we are making more in tips, they aren’t. Ask them if they need anything to drink, be patient when your ticket times are slow and always say please and thank you. Treat them the same way you would want your customers to treat you.
- Adjust credit cards tips. That’s called credit card fraud and not only might you lose your job if you do it, you could also go to jail. It may be tempting to write in another total on the the tip line, but no good is going to come of it. A customer is going to notice that instead of $18 their statement says $28. Is your job and freedom worth an extra ten bucks?
- Sleep with a co-worker. It never works out and then you have to spend the rest of your time at the restaurant trying to avoid each other on the schedule. Sleep with someone from the restaurant next door. Nobody at your job wants to hear about how great your relationship is with a co-worker and then have to later hear about what an asshole they are. Look elsewhere.
- Worry about their job after they punch out. One of the best things about waiting tables is that we don’t have to take our work home with us. Other than the occasional afterthought of a forgotten side of mayonnaise, our job is one we can leave behind when we leave the restaurant. As for the server nightmares we all have, well, that’s our subconscious and we can’t do anything about that.
- Question a bad tip. If you get a crap tip, accept it. Confronting a customer isn’t going to make them suddenly reach into their pocket and hand you another ten dollars. it’s only going to get you in trouble. For every bad tip, there are two good ones in your future.
And finally, one things smart servers should do:
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The Prozac Queen
Another thing smart servers don’t do (although this might work more for trainer/server/managers like we have where I work):
Don’t get onto another server for something you do yourself. For instance, don’t get onto me for for being habitually ten minutes late if you are habitually 20-30 minutes late like one of our server/managers is.
Also, if you have a beef with someone, a smart server (and a decent person) won’t do it where customers can hear you. This has happened to me on two different occasions with two different trainers and it was once heard by a customer in the next room. Yes, it was slow both days, but there’s really no reason for that.
Carol
I need to print this
Amy
I grew up with a chef father, and eventually started dating one 5 yrs ago, so I’ve always been good to my boh.. Now, 24 yrs in the boz, I AM boh!! And, tbh.. I get why cooks get bitchy with servers now! God, they can be annoying! Lol So, def be nice to the people who can make or break your shift. As for sleeping with coworkers, totally agree! Even my current bf and I understand we can’t work together (after trying 3 separate times!!) If we are arguing and trying to work, it’s bad. Or if he pissed me off during a shift, it carried over. It is nice though, to have a partner who understands the bs we live daily.
Amy
Damned autocorrect! *biz not boz!! ?
?
Peter
And never forget, can’t get in the weeds if you don’t care!
Carolyn
#1 – Yessss! Don’t let customers make you cry! I learned this lesson as a 16 year old hostess at Red Lobster – people could be downright abusive! One night a man was being especially awful – I kept myself together until they were finally seated and then muttered I was taking my break and ran off to an alcove near the kitchen entrance and burst into tears. This particularly gorgeous waiter (Darryl! swoon!) saw me and asked what was wrong – when I finally got out that it was about a customer, he straightened up, looked at me incredulously and said “why would you EVER cry about a customer? This ****** was getting his jollies torturing a teenage girl – what a scumbag! Are you going to let a scumbag like that make you cry?!?!? That trash is not worth your tears – now get up and get back out there!”
I dried my eyes, went back up front and was BULLETPROOF from that moment on! People upset that they had to wait 30 minutes for a non-call-ahead table of 20 in smoking on a busy Saturday night flipping their sh*t wouldn’t even make me blink – I would wait until they were done shouting and say “Would you like me to put your party on the list or not?” It got to the point that instead of everyone taking turns seating, answering the phone and taking names, I would stay at the podium and deal with the guests – new hosts would ask why I got to “just stand there all night” and I would say “you can take a turn!” and then later that night when they were done being screamed at and asked to switch back “nah – I am really enjoying just seating tables and answering calls tonight.”
I haven’t worked in a restaurant in years, but that lesson has served me well in every area of my life – I always picture Darryl (swoooooooooon!) and ask myself if it’s worth my tears, and if its not, I don’t waste my time!
Sage
YEah I gotta say… I’m an exception with #5. I slept with my coworker… 2 yrs later and we are building a family. All of our past co-workers still refer to us as “the perfect couple”. We had great teamwork, we would boost each other’s moods at work which boost our tips with tables and a wink while we pass each other in the kitchen could make all the shitty attitude from table 401 just disappear… our managers would purposely schedule us at the same time because they noticed the positive difference.
Dee
Number five is how I met my husband, although it was not a one night stand. On the flip side of that I did work at a corporate place that had four pregnant girls at once (this is 10 years ago) 2 were from Managers (a sports bar) one a cook and one her husband. All four are no longer with their baby daddies. Including the married couple. But love is love and a fling is a fling, we have been together 13 years now.
Nikki
same. I met my husband at work when we were both servers… 13 years and two kids later and we couldn’t be happier!
Outta the Game
I have an issue with #6. It’s always a side of ranch that gets forgotten, never a side of mayo- or is that just Texas? lol
Westover The Grey
Nah TN STRONG WITH THE RANCH they need a straw
Erin
RE: #8
…um sometimes “table scraps” (when someone takes a 2 bites of their filet and sends it back, or sends back half an artichoke, etc) are my only meal in a day! Don’t hate – I always think, well, they didn’t touch this part, miiiiine.
Lacey J Adcock
Right?! Who cares what other people do with garbage. I any not eat off another customers plate but I’ve known people who have that are less germaphobic than me, and I really don’t see the big deal.
Denise
I think #8 is about not eating off the customer’s plate before the customer does.
lynn
ion’t really agree with #5. the trick is fun is fun and work is work and ne’er the twain shall meet–same with just fraternizing between managers and hourly. ya don’t do it to sucker favors or suck under to harassment. but done it and seen it done more than a few times and all lived to tell the tale–in some instances, 40+ yrs later.
Linda Miller
exactly!
Tracy Fields
#10 Don’t leave without tipping your host/hostess — they can either screw you on your next shift or they can make the next shift flow easy as pie.
Laura Parrish
We are not allowed to tip the hostesses or cooks. Both of their positions are $20+ an hour, so I’m pretty sure they don’t need it. But, seriously, we got in trouble because those of us who tipped got our food faster or got sat more. Ended up in HR over that shit 😉 LOL
Jessica
Man, where are you working that cooks/hosts makes $20+ hourly. I’ll gladly come host as a second job for that.
Shana
$20+an hour where is this at,I need a part time job..lol
hails
Geeze where do you work for 20 tell me
Magenn
#9 Do not leave the restaurant without doing your side work or rolling silver. You are going to have the other servers mad at you and that means when you are in the weeds they aren’t going to help you.
Linda Miller
SO true!!!
Oregon Server
#8: I only saw this recently with a new hire, but do NOT eat off of a guests plate. We had to write, “No, those fries are not yours” on the board in the back just for her. Ew.