A Prayer for Red Lobster Servers During Endless Shrimp

All our thoughts and prayers go to those souls who are working at Red Lobster because the world famous Endless Shrimp promotion started yesterday. That’s right, Red Lobster employees, yesterday was not a bad dream. It was real. The constant demand for Parmesan Peppercorn Shrimp and Garlic Sriracha-Grilled Shrimp from people who don’t know how to say “please” or “thank you” were not figments of your alcohol-induced slumber. It really happened and it will happen again today, tomorrow and every day until the powers that be decide that you have suffered enough.

I have never worked at Red Lobster so I can only imagine the horror that it must be to deal with this kind of promotion. It is probably just as bad as Endless Apps at TGI Fridays, National Pancake Day at IHOP or Veteran’s Day at Applebee’s. I want you to know that we are all thinking of you.

Here is a little prayer for you to print out and carry with you to work today. Keep it close to your heart. Put a copy of it in every sidestand of every Red Lobster from Maine to California. Memorize it if you must.

shrimp
Also, if you can’t make it to New York City so see my show on Friday September 9th, you can click here and watch it on a live stream. LIVE STREAM, people!

16 thoughts on “A Prayer for Red Lobster Servers During Endless Shrimp

  1. Lori

    OMG!! When I first moved to St. Petersburg in 2004, I worked at the Red Lobster on 34th Street North for five weeks, and it was total hell. I was put on the Endless shrimp” nights, which was NOT very lucrative. We all had three table sections, and on the shrimp nights, we had a lot of campers, and cheap assholes. Party of three came in one night, only two ordered the endless shrimp. When the shrimp came out, the other woman asked for an extra plate. I told her that this was not permitted, as the shrimp is meant for one person, not to share. She just kept eating off the plates, and I went and told my manager, (who by the way, was a prick to all his employees) And he told me to handle it!! Really, three very well rounded African-American women, who obviously are PO’ed because they can’t share, and you want little ole me, to get up in their grills, and tell them they can’t share? Hell NO!! At that very moment, as we were looking at the table, the one woman who wanted the extra plate, turned to her purse setting on the seat beside her, opened it, fumbled around with what appeared to be a plastic bag, then grabbed one plate of shrimp, and DUMPED it in her purse… I said to my manager, “Did you just see that?” To which he replied, “Oh, that happens from time to time.” Needless to say, after I kept bringing them shrimp, and they sat there at the table for what seemed like an eternity, when the bill arrived, they left two whopping dollars. Manager was mad at ME for not addressing the issue. Sure, I am going to risk my life, with three woman at the table who’s total combined weight was probably 2 ton, and give them hell, over what I had already predicted was going to be a shitty tip to start with. (You know what I mean, after a while, you can spot the non-tippers, and two dollar tippers from ten miles away) Sure, I will get right on that one, Boss.

    Reply
    1. Carey Colomb

      I work at a restaurant in Ft. Lauderdale that serves all you can eat shrimp EVERY FREAKING MONDAY AND TUESDAY😱 It never ceases to amaze me at how people act! They ask for refills as soon as you put down a plate. They ask for refills when they are full and when you tell them they can’t take them home they get indignant and ask what are you going to do with them then? They ask for refills after they have emptied them in their purse. I then ask them where the shells are! They camp out, they DEMAND your attention, even when you are with another customer! People lose their mind and respect for others over this!

      Reply
    2. Carey Colomb

      I work at a restaurant in Ft. Lauderdale that serves all you can eat shrimp EVERY FREAKING MONDAY AND TUESDAY😱 It never ceases to amaze me at how people act! They ask for refills as soon as you put down a plate. They ask for refills when they are full and when you tell them they can’t take them home they get indignant and ask what are you going to do with them then? I will toss them before I give them to you! They ask for refills after they have emptied them in their purse. I then ask them where the shells are! They tell me I bought them I can do what I want with them. Well no you can’t, you haven’t paid for them yet. They never saw the no sharing very clearly on the menu. They camp out, they DEMAND your attention, even when you are with another customer! People lose their mind and respect for others over this! I have even been told ” I don’t HAVE to tip you

      Reply
  2. Lori

    OMG!! When I first moved to St. Petersburg in 2004, I worked at the Red Lobster on 34th Street North for five weeks, and it was total hell. I was put on the Endless shrimp” nights, which was NOT very lucrative. We all had three table sections, and on the shrimp nights, we had a lot of campers, and cheap assholes. Party of three came in one night, only two ordered the endless shrimp. When the shrimp came out, the other woman asked for an extra plate. I told her that this was not permitted, as the shrimp is meant for one person, not to share. She just kept eating off the plates, and I went and told my manager, (who by the way, was a prick to all his employees) And he told me to handle it!! Really, three very well rounded African-American women, who obviously are PO’ed because they can’t share, and you want little ole me, to get up in their grills, and tell them they can’t share? Hell NO!! At that very moment, as we were looking at the table, the one woman who wanted the extra plate, turned to her purse setting on the seat beside her, opened it, fumbled around with what appeared to be a plastic bag, then grabbed one plate of shrimp, and DUMPED it in her purse… I said to my manager, “Did you just see that?” To which he replied, “Oh, that happens from time to time.” Needless to say, after I kept bringing them shrimp, and they sat there at the table for what seemed like an eternity, when the bill arrived, they left two whopping dollars. Manager was mad at ME for not addressing the issue. Sure, I am going to risk my life, with three woman at the table who’s total combined weight was probably 2 ton, and give them hell, over what I had already predicted was going to be a shitty tip to start with. (You know what I mean, after a while, you can spot the non-tippers, and two dollar tippers from ten miles away) Sure, I will get right on that one, Boss.

    Reply
  3. Terri

    I used to work in a restaurant that had All You Can Eat lobster night, every Wednesday. It SUUUUUUUUUCKED. Not only did you have the standard-issue campers/lousy tippers, but by the end of the night we would start dropping and breaking things because EVERY SINGLE SURFACE IMAGINABLE was coated in butter. I still get an eye twitch thinking about it.

    Reply
  4. Dorie

    Thank you Bitchy! Love it! And I am printing it out!!!
    We have one guy that we call Cherry Sprite Guy ( bc those are Endless too) and he actually picks up the bowl from the scampi shrimp and drinks it!!! Ewe! He sits for hours eating and slurping and leaves a lousy tip! This is just one example of the clientele that this kind of promotion attracts! Why do we still promote obesity and gluttony at its finest???
    Thanks for letting me bitch too!!!
    Dorie (and yes my name is Dorie and I work in a seafood restaurant!!!)

    Reply
  5. mary roering

    True, but you should leave Veteran’s Day out of the rant. They did fight for our country and fought for our freedom =D

    Reply
    1. dead_elvis

      Just because they’re getting a free meal in honor of their service doesn’t mean they should be cheap fucks & stiff their servers.

      Reply
  6. Trina

    Thank you, Bitchy, for thinking of us, in this, our darkest hour. The powers that be decided that Labor Day was the PERFECT day to open this craptastic promotion. Needless to say, we all had our asses handed to us endlessly. There isn’t enough tequila in the world to make this ok.

    Reply
  7. FaQ

    Revenge will be sweet when all that lousy cholesterol in that cheap ass shrimp gets to work clogging all those arteries on these miserable hamplanets and they start stroking out and/or dropping dead. Then we can commiserate with those tragic folk who work in nursing homes who will have to shovel the Cream of Wheat into their drooling paralyzed gobs. Hallelujah

    Reply
  8. Alice Butler

    What is endless shrimp? Why would I want infinite shrimp as a customer? I don’t even like shrimp. They creep me out.

    Reply
  9. Susannah

    Lori, that reminds me of the day I quit Olive Garden! Group of 6, 5 orders water, one orders a peach iced tea, 5 orders soup, one orders salad, and they proceeded to share everything. I ended up bringing at least a dozen salad and tea refills, and when I had the audacity to charge them all for a tea and a soup and salad combo (because we had literally just been told that we had to do that the week before, or risk getting fired), they went ballistic. Standing up, screaming that it was all politics (i never did figure that one out), and that they would not pay. I go to get my manager who was locked in the office talking to her boyfriend, and she tells me to handle it, reminds me that I can’t take the extra drinks or salads off, and that if they don’t pay their bill I either need to pay it or I’m fired. Darden is the worst.

    Reply

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