Five Reasons Servers Aren’t People (guest post)

As I take a vacation and drink my way through Italy, I have enlisted guest bloggers to fill the Bitchy Waiter void. Please enjoy their musings, but not so much that you stop liking me. I’m needy. xo, BW

  1. They don’t have feelings. So, when you shake your glass or snap your fingers, they don’t actually punch you in the throat. They should but they don’t.
  2. They don’t have bills. They don’t have to worry about rent or car payments, so no point in tipping them. They serve just for the love of serving.
  3. They don’t have to use the washroom. That’s why you see them running around for eight hours without a break. They don’t need one.
  4. They actually love to clean up after you. So, do let your kid spill everything and throw his food on the floor. Servers live for that, they really are here just to serve you.
  5. They have infinite patience. So, do ask all the questions you can think of. “What’s in the stir fry?” or “What is the burger served with?” Nothing they love more than reading the menu that’s right in front of you.

Do go ahead, they aren’t people, so no need to treat them like they are.

Laura McGowan writes for Skinny and Single.

You can follow her on Twitter, Facebook or Instagram.

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