TGI Fridays Serves Most Impatient Customer Ever

TGIFPoor Mark. Not only is he suffering through a terrible experience at TGI Fridays waiting 15 minutes for nachos, I can also assume that he is going through life with no legs, vocal chords or a spine. I assume this because, rather than use any of those body parts to discover where is server is, he instead goes to the TGI Fridays Facebook page looking for him. That’s right, Mark didn’t see his server for 11 whole minutes and complained about it on Facebook. Umm, Mark, maybe the server was walking right past you but you didn’t see him because you were too busy looking at your phone typing in TGI Fridays.

It seems that Mark ordered two appetizers and one arrived very quickly while an excruciating 11 minutes passed by before there was any word on the second one. While he waited in vain for his nachos, he did spy a woman who was sweeping near his table. Rather than saying something to her like, “Excuse me, would you mind getting our server for us?” or “Pardon me, but we are still waiting for our second appetizer. Can you please have someone check on that?” Mark thought it made more sense to go to Facebook and ask them to find the server. As if there is a 24-hour a day, 7-days a week social media slave somewhere who has a giant computer in front of him that tracks where every TGI Fridays server in the country is at any given moment.

Alert, alert! Mark at Table 5 in store #201 needs his server stat. His server is Erik and the tracking device that we implanted in Erik’s arm tells me he is in the second stall of the restroom taking a dump because he had the Parmesan-crusted Crab Flounder for lunch today. SOMEONE GO GET HIM! This is Facebook for God’s sake and it deserves an immediate response! MARK NEEDS ATTENTION. Go!

After another four minutes passed by, Mark goes back to Facebook to let the world know that his server has reappeared to tell him that the restaurant is out of nacho ingredients. Mark is all catty about TGI Fridays being out of nachos, but, bitch it happens. Order yourself some Tuscan Spinach Dip and get the fuck over it.TGIF2

We servers also know now why the server was unavailable for 11 minutes. He was in the kitchen freaking the fuck out:

Are you freaking kidding me? We don’t have the cheese sauce for the nachos? And you waited ten minutes after I rang it in to tell me? This is TGI fucking Fridays, how can we be out of nachos? Are you sure we’re out? What? you want me to go down to dry storage and look for the sauce? That’s not my job, fuck that. Okay, fine, what does it look like? Is it in a bag, a can or a box? Or maybe it’s a powder, I don’t fucking know.

The server goes to dry storage only to return four minutes later empty handed.

I can’t find that shit. Fuck it, lemme just go tell this asshole to order a Tuscan Spinach Dip and get the fuck over it.

Sadly, Mark failed to keep us posted on his TGI Fridays debacle. Maybe his thumbs were too tired to update us because he had spent twenty minutes Yelping, Instagraming and Tweeting about how awful it was that he could not get nachos. Or maybe he realized that he can get answers to his questions much quicker if he actually uses his vocal chords and speaks to real humans who are in his presence rather than hoping that Facebook will solve all his problems.


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