Danger: Waiters Ahead

There is an article floating about on the Internet and the Facebook that has been brought to my attention by more than one person. (Two people.) It is a list of who you should and should not trust with your credit card. The list is only eight people long: your child, your loved ones, the hired help, virus protection (that’s a person?), the debt collector, people who call you on the phone, your waiter and yourself. Basically, they are saying every single person in the whole entire world is someone that may try to rip you off. Doesn’t that list sort of encompass all human beings? Even the Pope could be classified as “hired help.” They did, however, leave off the cocksmacks who work at the Home Depot on 59th and Third Avenue who ripped me off four years ago, stole my identity and racked up some plane tickets to Puerto Rico. Here is what the article has to say about we horribly untrustworthy waiters:

6. The disappearing waiter. Anytime your plastic is swept away by another person, you have reason for pause. Unfortunately, some restaurant staff may be especially dangerous. “Many skimming networks operate using wait staff,” warns Steve Rhode of GetOutOfDebt.org. “They will pay $50 or more for credit card information that can be swiped off your card using a small electronic device that reads the magnetic strip on the card. Skimming only takes two seconds.” While you can’t always control where they take the card, it’s important to check your receipts and statements immediately.

Dangerous? In all my years I have never known any waiter who was being paid fifty bucks to lift credit card info from customers. Then again I never worked at BBQ’s either so maybe it does happen. This article is typical fear-mongering in order to get more people to read it. It seems to me that swiping the info from a credit card at work would be way too easy to get caught and therefore not justify the federal credit card fraud charges that would soon be filed against the waiter. But there it is: DO NOT TRUST YOUR DANGEROUS WAITER. Not only will we read the magnetic strip, we will also take that gold Am Ex as soon as we get it and run to Macy’s for a new black belt and shoes for work. As soon as I have that hot little Discover card, I am going to log onto Amazon.com and buy as many books as possible. If I see a platinum Visa card, I am immediately calling my cell phone to order a lifetime supply of Snuggies. That’s right, I’m dangerous.

That’s not to say that we should not be vigilant about our credit cards. In this world, you never know who will rip us off, but to specifically pinpoint waiters is wrong. If someone is so freaked out by the use of credit cards, they should look into this thing called “cash.” It works too. I use it all the time. And since we are pointing fingers, why not point at the actual credit card companies themselves? They have the right to jack up their interest rate any fucking time they want to. They can rip you off and do it legally. Say you have credit card with a 6% interest rate but one month you pay your bill one day late and then all of a sudden the interest rates jumps to 27% plus you have to pay a $35 late fee. I’d way rather trust my waiter with my credit card than whoever the fuck runs the credit card company. Fuck them.

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