The countdown begins…

So it’s been a while since I have blogged. Get over it. Here it is. I have had the good fortune to not wait tables for four weeks and surprisingly my attitude in life has been much much better. Fear not. Within two weeks, I will again be slinging hash and filled with the hatred and loathing that one can only get by taking food orders from assholes. Contrary to popular belief, there are other things in life than waiting tables and that is what I have been doing instead. On the first day that I did not have to bring french toast to bitchy ladies and their ugly children, I decided that I wanted to go have brunch and see what it feels like from the other side of the menu. So on a Sunday morning, I rolled out of bed and dragged my ass to some place that served overpriced eggs and mimosas. I had brunch served to me. The waitress ignored me, took too long to bring my drink, the omelette was too soft, the hash browns were not crispy, she never checked back, she forgot to bring the check and then she hurried me out of the booth because other people were waiting for a table. What a cunt. I now know what it is like to be served by me. Mere days will pass before I am back to waiting tables and Bitchy Waiter will again rear his ugly head.


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