Monthly Archives: September 2019

Karin is Not Happy With Olive Garden

Life is hard and if your name is Karin, it’s even harder.

Case in point is this Facebook post from Karin who went to Olive Garden and was disappointed with her order of calamari, which was “tiny” and “overdone” and “heaven knows what.” (Spoiler alert, Karin: it’s squid.)

I am not here to disagree with Karin about the quality of her calamari, for I was not there when she ordered it. While she was settled into a booth surrounded by murals of Italian scenery and plastic grape vines, I was far, far away from any Olive Garden. For all we know, the calamari was overdone and tiny, which may or may not be what one expects from Olive Garden. What I am here to point out is that Karin is upset by the fact that she had to pay for a salad. Yes, that’s right. She had to actually PAY for something she wanted to eat and that’s a “rip off.” Can you believe the nerve of a restaurant expecting someone to pay for food they ordered?

Even though Karin realizes that she ordered an appetizer that doesn’t come with a salad, she is still distressed about having to pay $4.79 for one. I suppose an entree would have come with a salad, but Karin made the conscious decision to order something that specifically didn’t come with a salad, but she still feels the need to publicly air her grievances about it.

Karin, Karin, Karin… you are doing a wonderful job of upholding the expectations that all servers have about someone with your name. If you wanted something that came with a salad, then you have to order something that comes with a salad. Does that make sense? Let me make it more clear: if the menu says it doesn’t come with a salad IT. DOES. NOT. COME. WITH. A. SALAD. Your complaint is not valid. It is not a rip off. Besides, $4.79 is a pretty good deal for a salad. I went to East Hampton, New York two weeks ago and my jaw fell on the floor when I saw a side Caesar salad that cost $16.00. I didn’t order it, but If I had, I certainly wouldn’t have gone to the the restaurant’s Facebook page to call it a rip off. Yes, it was a rip off, but I made the decision to not order it. You did make the decision to order it. So, rip off or not, it was your call. That’s on you.

As for the less than ideal calamari, maybe Olive Garden will see your complaint and send you a gift card. In fact, I’m sure they will so I want to give you some advice for when you use it: please tip on the full amount and not just what you pay for. In other words, if they send you a $20 gift card and your bill is $25, you should tip a total of five bucks. With your name being Karin, I’m sure your inclination is to only tip on the five dollars you spent, but if you leave your server one dollar, all you’re going to do is solidify the fiery hatred that 99% of servers have for women with your name.

Don’t be a Karen, Karin.

Chuck E. Cheese Manager Obliterates Customer

This image has been floating around on the Internet for a few days, but I kept not reading it because the text was so small. After about the 100th person tagged me, I figured it must be worth the read. And boy oh boy, was it ever worth it. I have taken the liberty to type it out so that anyone else out there with the eyesight of a half-blind mole can enjoy the complete and utter savagery of a Chuck E. Cheese employee when he let it all out on a woman made Norma. I do not know you, Cary Palmerr, but you are my hero. I bow down to you with the greatest of respect.

Here is the text of the review that the customer wrote that explains exactly what this manager did. It is glorious.

Visited xxxxxxx. I asked for a deal that I had a coupon for. The rude little girl told me that she would not honor my coupon. I spend a lot of money at Chuck E. Cheese’s and a guest should never be told no. I asked to speak to the manager immediately. A disheveled blonde man with a coffee mug came up to me and asked what the problem was. I had assumed he knew his role well enough to honor the coupon as any manager should. I told him and said “I know you will honor this.” He said “No, I don’t think I will.” When I told him I spend a lot of money here and it was my kid’s birthday he said “Listen Karen. This is a Chuck E. Cheese. I can’t throw a rock without hitting three people who’s birthday it is.” This disgusted me. My name is Norma. He was totally ignorant, rude, and condescending. I demanded to speak to the highest management staff member of this store. He had the nerve to spin in a circle and ask me “How can I help you?” I demanded the corporate phone number. He was obviously trying to entertain the young girl cashier who was giggling the entire time. Completely unprofessional and rude. Worst customer service I have ever seen in a restaurant in my entire life. He gave me a card with the district corporate number on it and I told him I would not be returning to this store and I would tell my friends not to come here either. He told me to have “a chuck e day” which was very obviously spiteful. I was furious and appalled. He is a smug jerk. After, I went to my car to cool off and called the number on the card. The corporate employee answered and said “Hello again Karen how have you been?” IT WAS THE SAME JACK*** INSIDE THE STORE. MY NAME IS NORMA.

This man needs to be fired. I am writing a letter to corporate. I will never step foot in another chuck e cheese again for the rest of my life and will be telling friends and family to do the same.