Once upon a time, a long long time ago, I appeared on the Dr. Phil show. It was truly a magical experience and just to hear Dr. Phil repeatedly refer to me as βBitchyβ sent shivers down my spine. My words on that show solidified my public opinion about babies and generated lots and lots of comments. Someone recently had a new butt nugget of wisdom to share with me regarding my time on Dr. Phil. The comment showed up on the blog post entitled I Hate Your Baby. So What? Someone named Anonymous said:
I USED to be a huge fan. However, you have propagated PIT BULLS much like Mexicans protect their cocaine. Good luck with that. I think you have serious fucking issues now. Especially with your Midwest crowd. Shit rolls down hill kiddo. You have seen your day. you will never get famous after the shit you allow on your FB page. Absolutely disgusting.
Okay, Anonymous, I donβt quite get what youβre saying here. Please allow me to dissect each line.
I USED to be a huge fan. Congratulations on your weight loss! I know that weight management is not easy and for you to have once been huge must have been very difficult. I applaud your efforts and hope that you soon reach your goal weight. So proud!
However, you have propagated PIT BULLS much like Mexicans protect their cocaine. What the fuck does this mean? I know what the word propagate means but I donβt see how it relates to pit bulls. Iβm sorry, I mean PIT BULLS. Am I breeding people who share my ideas? Perhaps, but how am I doing it in the same way that Mexicans protect their cocaine? I am half-Mexican and I have never once had any cocaine to protect. What kind of generalization is that, that all Mexicans do is protect their cocaine? I bet there are plenty of Mexicans who never protect their cocaine. My grandmother lived to be 86 years old and she was all Mexican. Never once did I see her protect her cocaine. She kept it in a sugar bowl on her kitchen counter just like most red-blooded Mexicans I know. I remember reaching for it once thinking it was for my Cheerios and she yelled at me, βAye, mijo, get away from my cocaine!β but itβs not like she was protecting it like it was the Alamo or something.
Good luck with that. Why thank you, thatβs very kind. But what are you wishing me good luck for exactly?
I think you have serious fucking issues now. Especially with your Midwest crowd. I think my midwest crowd began to have issues with me in December of 2008 when I started a blog with the word βbitchyβ in it. They continued to have issues with me when they realized I am gay and then the issues carried over when I married my husband. I know there are plenty of midwesterners who have no issue whatsoever with me and for those who do, they can go eat a dick. Same goes for anyone who lives on one of the coasts and has issues with me. They too can go eat dicks.
Shit rolls down hill kiddo. I love this saying. It reminds me of my other grandmother who was not Mexican. (Being an Anglo-Saxon Southern Baptist, she kept quaaludes in her sugar bowl. Ah, memories.) She had an embroidered pillow with this very saying on it that she kept in the guest bedroom and I always loved it. Thank you for bringing me a wonderful memory.
You have seen your day. You will never get famous after the shit you allow on your FB page. Absolutely disgusting. I looked at my Facebook page to see what disgusting things I have allowed to happen there that will keep me from being famous. I was shocked by what I saw! There is a link to a fundraising page I posted that is to help a restaurant dishwasher who was hit by a car. There is also a contest happening right now where the will winner will receive new supplies to make them a better server. And my last blog post was called The 5 Best Things About Being a Server. Disgusting, indeed! Youβre probably right about none of these things making me famous since we all know that to become famous one has to release a sex tape first. There will be no sex tape, but I must admit I felt a teeny tiny bit famous when I was sitting with Matt and Savannah on the Today Show. That feeling diminished the next day when I got to work and mopped the floor.
As always, I appreciate your comment. Although itβs hard to believe, I read every single on that comes in and I love when one sparks an idea for a Comment on Comments blog post. Thank you for that.
Leanne
Hi there BW! Love your stuff! I was wondering if the episode of Dr.Phil that you guest starred on is available anywhere on the web? I couldn’t find the full episode on YouTube. I would really like to see it! Bitch on, my sassy friend!
pkjane
I was trying TO figure out how you breed PIT BULLS in a NY APARTMENT.
monica
The disection of that comment is amazing. I love it.
Thomas
I love the disection!
Swiss
It sounds like that person is trying to protect their cocaine
sally
Yes, by keeping it up their nose!
Heidi
Also from the Midwest and have loved you forever. While I have no issue with you and your assuredly awesome husband…I am strait and have a confession to make….I love to eat dicks (or at least something equally nasty). Does that make me a awful mid-westerner?? Apologies in advance!
melissa in houston
I read the comment twice and didn’t understand it. So yeah, that was odd.
Joe
Yeah. Whoever wrote those comments is clearly ******* stupid.
Adam
What the bloody hell was that even about? PIT BULLS? Is that ghetto-speak for something? I’ve been in the Midwest 29 years, and I don’t think i’ve ever heard that phrase used to reference something. Then again, I don’t associate with ghetto folk. Also, Midwest? What?
UnZen Jen
Anybody that has an issue with you, and cocaine, is a giant turd. Since when did everybody decide that if they don’t like something, instead of clicking to get off the page, that they have to waste your time with their crappy ‘ I hate you’ letters. I guess it makes them feel more important or maybe they feel like they are really stickin’ it to you….idk. They all need to go take a hike, go back to what ever cat videos they may have been watching, and leave the adults alone.
anne marie in philly
WTeverlovinF was THAT all about? made no fucking sense; anonymous must have been smokin’ some badass loco weed.
this east coast str8 girl loves her some bitchy! π
Rainbow Sprinkles
I have to admit that last summer I did threaten (the Hostess) to jump in the middle of a table and bark like a dog if they asked me for separate checks,I don’t think it was from reading your blog though….
ShezAnEnigma
When he said Propagated Pit bulls, did he mean you have turned everyone bitchy? – Because in all reality – I am fairly certain everyone was probably bitchy before they got to your blog. You just gave us a space to vent.
Cherry
Wow… just wow. That comment had to have come from a member of the Westboro Baptist Church. I happen to ADORE your bitchiness, intelligence, dedication to your job, sharing of your experiences, and your sense of humor. Hey if we didn’t have sarcasm and a twisted sense of humor, we would not survive two minutes in the service industry. Keep on doing what you do, you are already famous and we love you. I have told many, many of my co-workers and friends about your blog and they all are big fans now as well. Everyone that doesn’t like your page or what you have to say, like you said, can go eat a dick!
chacha1
“propagated pit bulls” has to be one of the looniest non-sequiturs I’ve seen in an anonymous spam comment, and I’ve seen quite a few.
Chunky Mama
Not that you care, really, but I’m from the Midwest and I’ve loved you for years. π
Mellie
Me too!
Dana
Me too!
Heidi Jo
Same here. π Great post.