Not Too Close For Comfort

At my job, I get to serve drinks during the shows of some extraordinarily talented people, some of whom are very famous. It’s kind of a treat when someone I have known of my entire life shows up to sing there and I get to meet them and talk to them and hear their show. It’s definitely a perk with my job. This very thing happened a few weeks ago.

If you grew up in the 80’s, you must remember Too Close for Comfort. It ran on ABC from 1980 to 1986 and it was pretty popular. It ran on Tuesday nights right after Happy Days, Lavern and Shirley and Three’s Company. It was the best television night of the week ever, except for Saturday night when Love Boat and Fantasy Island came on. If you don’t recall Too Close For Comfort, what the hell is wrong with you? I loved the crazy wacky neighbor Monroe who was was played by Jim J. Bullock. He was gayer than the day is long and makes Lispy Gay seem like a butch leather daddy. The show was your typical sitcom fare with a bumbling dad (Ted Knight), two hot daughters (Has Been #1 and Has Been #2) and a sensible all knowing mom named Muriel Rush played with perfection by Nancy Dussault. Nancy Dussault is who I had the pleasure of listening to while I waited tables. She has a real long legitimate Broadway career and I was excited to meet this lady who I had grown up watching. When she came in for her sound check, I was hoping she would be as cool and as sweet as she seemed on television in the 80’s. (It’s amazing that I an even recall seeing her on television in the 80’s since I wasn’t even born yet…) Guess what. She was so freakin‘ cool. She was genuine and sincere and smiled a lot and I even had a conversation with her which thrilled me to no end. I would like to dictate the entire conversation for your reading pleasure:

NANCY: Hi there. Would you mind getting me a glass of water please?
ME: Not at all. Do you want ice?
NANCY: No thank you.
(I got her a glass of water and put a straw in it. The straw still had the paper wrapper around the top of it. I handed her the glass as she pulled the paper off the straw.)
NANCY: Teamwork!
ME: That’s right!

So I may have only had the most banal of conversations, but this is what I was thinking in my head:

Oh my God, I can’t believe I am meeting you. I loved Too Close For Comfort. Do you still talk to the rest of the cast? Well I know you don’t talk to Ted Knight anymore because he’s dead and that would be creepy, but do you still talk to the live ones? Was Jim J. Bullock as gay as he seemed? I loved him. He was funny. I know your character was a photographer who used to be a singer but how come they didn’t let you sing on the show all the time? Oh my god, that would have been so cool. I love in the opening credits how Ted Knight would fall off that couch? That was so funny. Was it hard to shoot that scene because it was so funny? Oh my god, it was so funny. Hey, do you know Fonzie? Can I hug you? Because I really think you’re cool. You guys should totally have a reunion show and I would totally watch it. I mean, it would be sad that Ted Knight wouldn’t be on it, but it would still be pretty cool. The girls who played your daughters were so hot but Monroe was my favorite. Next to you, I mean. You are my favorite. Hey, do you know Suzanne Sommers?

Don’t worry, I kept it together and made that conversation stay inside my mind. I played it smooth. Her show was great. She can still sing, she’s very funny and I really enjoyed getting her a glass of water. And you should totally refresh your memory about her television career by watching this video. Once you see it, you too will think that when Ted Knight falls off the couch, it’s really really for reals funny.

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  1. Dave the greek

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