Your Kid, Your Mess. Not My Job.

There is a never-ending debate about who is responsible for cleaning up the mess a child makes in a restaurant. While it is our job as servers to clear plates and make sure our section and the restaurant is neat and clean, it is not our job to get on our knees after a two-year old attempts to eat a plate of spaghetti and meatballs that ended up mostly on the floor, highchair, table, walls, ceiling and the menu. The parents need to accept some responsibility when their child is a miserable fucking failure at feeding itself. I was sent a screenshot of a restaurant review written by someone named Adina who left one star because after his “boy” broke a bottle of vinegar, the server expected him to clean it up. Adina was less than pleased and considered it very unprofessional. Okay, so maybe the server shouldn’t have said he wasn’t from the cleaning company, but, yeah. I too think the parent should be the one to clean up that broken bottle of vinegar. I applaud this server who brought out the mop for the parent to clean up after their own kid.

We servers are more than happy to clean up a reasonable amount after a customer has dined in our section. Well, maybe “happy” isn’t the right word, but we expect to because it’s part of the job. But where is the line? Why should I have to mop up a puddle of vinegar and spend the rest of my day smelling like a douche when Adina could do it and smell exactly the way he did when he first came into the restaurant? Parents need to understand that we are there to serve food, not clean up after their filthy children who have shitty motor skills and can’t hold things.

I have cleaned up plenty of messes and mopped up more than my share of spills over the years. The times that I really resent it is when the person who is responsible for the mess simply expect me to do it and don’t apologize or thank me. Once, I remember mopping up a spilled soda after a kid knocked it over and the mother didn’t even acknowledge that I was doing it. I actually had to mop around her feet because she couldn’t even be bothered to move them out of the way. I wanted to take the mop and shove it up her poop chute and let her walk through the restaurant with the mop hanging out of her ass so she could clean the entire floor, but I didn’t. I was “professional” and did it for her, but when I do that, I expect there to be some kind of financial compensation for it. If you plan on tipping me 20% for my basic service, then you’d better up the ante if a mop is involved.

But back to Adina: it was your kid that broke the vinegar bottle. Dining out in a restaurant doesn’t mean that you have a personal fucking manservant at your fingertips for a couple of hours. If your kids makes an extraordinary mess, then that’s on you. As soon as you accepted the responsibility of being a parent, then you also accepted that you are going to be cleaning up after it. Whether it’s a dirty diaper, a broken bottle of vinegar or puke from too much tequila on his 18th birthday, it is not a server’s job to clean that up. Your child, your mess. Take your one-star review and choke on it.

22 thoughts on “Your Kid, Your Mess. Not My Job.

  1. Becky Lewis

    I own a restaurant myself in Tennessee, and I will be the first to tell you that I have personally taken a broom and pan to the guest with a towel and ask the parent are they ready for this or need this for the moment or do they wish to wait until their meal is finished!!! Same goes with a squealing baby, I’ve asked if they would like a baby mussel or their food out first!

    Reply
    1. Michael

      I am shocked that you don’t have 1 star review on Yelp page. That is a big no, no. Also pretty sure it violates health department rules

      Reply
  2. Angela

    Certainly the wait staff or the manager, being me, (part owner also) has to bring the proper equipment to the table, such as buckets rags towels mops brooms dust pans, but if your baby makes a big ole mess, you better stand your ass up and help me clean that shit up.

    Reply
  3. Brooke

    I once had a table where the kid spilled his milk all over he floor. Parents made no apology or offer to clean it up. As I was on my hands and knees soaking up the mess, the mom looked down at me and said “Can we get some biscuits.” It was the closest I’ve ever come to slapping a complete stranger.

    Reply
      1. MegS

        A parents job is to be a parent. Being a parent means being responsible and accountable for whatever YOUR ill behaved crotch fruit does.
        A servers job is to serve guests, be hospitable to guests and create an enjoyable experience.
        I would have handed you a broom and told you- it’s your job to clean up after your kid. I

        Reply
        1. Michelle

          I can guarantee to you that not only would i not be sweeping/mopping but you as server would been fired. Yesterday by accident i spilled my large drink at McDonald, staff cleaned it up as their their job and not mine. I do not work their, if i wanted to clean i would have stayed home.

          Reply
  4. Marni Thi

    I once worked in a buffet restaurant where majority of the families that would come in had the messiest children I have ever experienced in my 10 years as a server. There was one family in particular who were particularly bad. Like children grabbing bowls of custard and fingerpainting it onto the windows bad. Throwing food at the walls to see what would stick bad. Even the adults were pretty awful. On one occasion one of them called me to the clean table they’d just sat at, pointed at the clean floor and asked me to clean it up. Confused, I asked what was needed to be cleaned up, and she looked me dead in the eye, picked up her glass, emptied it on the floor and smashed the glass in front of me. My manager ended up charging them a deposit if they wanted to come in. If the area was clean and tidy when they left, they got it back. Otherwise it was a ‘cleaning fee’. Surprised they didn’t just get banned tbh.

    Reply
  5. J

    I’ve had kids rub jello/bread into the floor, and a kid puked all over the damn table, smear shit in the bathroom, put fingers in the buffet food, sneeze in the buffet line…only one parent ever tipped me for a mess. Bitches putting poopy diapers where they don’t belong etc etc etc!!!!

    I get that kids are messy n shit…you really want the same person serving your food that you will EAT to get on all fours in your child’s filth touching puke, piss, shit, and rubbed in food on the floor? You want a fucking nurse or a waiter???

    Reply
  6. Paco

    People sometimes think I’m weird when I get down to clean my son’s food off the ground after our meal. Many people tell me, “they have people to clean that up, why are you doing it?”. I understand that they have staff to clear tables and clean up, but I just never feel right about leaving a message. I’m also the person that puts all their paper trash on the plates and tries to clear off crumbs onto the plates too. When I’m at a restaurant, I feel like I am a guest at someone else’s property.

    Reply
  7. Michael

    If employee ever brought me a broom and /or a mop and told me to clean it up, I would be filing complain against that restaurant and demand that employee be fired. It’s not my job as customer to clean. I don’t work at this restaurant. Have you ever seen fast food employee hand parent cleaning equipment to clean their child mess? If not then why do you expect someone to do it at your food place. If you feel it’s not your job to clean the mess then maybe time for a new job

    Reply
    1. JD

      If the waiter is bringing you a mop it’s because you were a total failure at eating your meal. Hell yes clean up after yourself. And your kid.

      Reply
  8. Batcat

    I used to be a server. To this day I shudder at the idea of waiting on families with small children.
    I hate parents/ grandparents who assume I love their children
    I don’t. Why would I? Do you all love my kid? You all tip me so I can feed him? Or let me go home on time so I can see him? Nope, the thought never crossed the minds of these idiots
    Happy families with, if not well behaved, at lest well patented children? A rare joy
    Am I bitter? You bet. To this day i avoid even sitting near kids

    Reply
  9. #hospitaliy smh lol

    Wow tony “tone” Vega thats a little harsh….. sounds like you have been sitting at the designated kids table to long maybe you need a time out or your dipper changed. 😂

    If we all quit there would be no one to wait on your jerk ASS all the retauraunts would have no staff….. because frankly this in a common problem! Non parenting parents.

    The problem here is your “server” is not you’re slave or your made. Be polite, appolagize if the mess is extrodinary, don’t expect anyone to do anything you would not do yourself…. “unless” and I use quotations you expect to compensate them for the above and beyond assistance.

    Reply
    1. Michelle

      I got some news for you “hospitality” I am customer and it’s not my job to keep the restaurant clean. Instead it’s yours and busboy job. If I want to clean I would have stayed home. I guarantee that there is no way in hell will I be doing your job cleaning up after myself and my kids. If you feel that it’s not your job then find a new one. There plenty of people that want a job

      Reply
      1. Annie

        Michelle (or is it Natasha? – you give off this old world, Russian vibe – or is it just the bad syntax?), why don’t you and Boris B., and all your little brats confine your dining experiences to Mickey D’s or Chu cky Cheese. (Leave Moose and Squirrel alone!)

        And I bet your house is a pigsty.

        Reply
        1. Michelle

          Huh? Why would you assume i have anything to do with Russian? Didn’t see any comment from any “boris b “either. As confining my dining to Mickey D, that is my choice to make. You are welcome to do employee job, but i am not about to do that. If you don’t like having to clean up, then welcome to find another job. It appears we have lowest unemployment ever, shoudn’t be hard to change your job.

          Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *