Woman Goes Ballistic For Meatball Marinara Sub

screen-shot-2016-09-22-at-2-37-47-pmAn unidentified woman at an unidentified Subway had a serious meltdown when she was unable to get her Meatball Marinara Sub. I mean, this woman melted more than the cheese does when they pop my 12” turkey club into that little mini oven thingy. Thankfully, someone had a cell phone and recorded the entire scene and even more blessedly, that person filmed it in horizontal mode. Will wonders never cease?

The video is long, but if you want to hear the best part, just skip to the 2:20 mark where she claims to hate being an asshole to the sandwich artist. For someone who doesn’t want to be a bitch, it turns out she’s really, really good at it.

“Get a fucking meatball sub! Get it!! Fucking get it!!”

She seems on the verge of tears and her throat sounds drier than her hair looks. I gotta give it up to Mr. Subway who remains calm through the whole scene. If I was behind that line, I would have reached over the glass, pulled her pants out of her ass crack, shoved her keys up her culo and told her to settle for a cold cut combo. I also notice that she appears to be holding rolls of coins. Classy. The woman screeches that she has been having this Meatball Marinara Mystery every time she comes in for the past six years. Ummm, if they never have what you want, why do you keep coming back? My suggestion to her is to walk out the door, turn right or left and look for another Subway. If it’s anything like New York City, there should be another one next door.

This video is traveling fast across the Internet so you know it’s only a matter of days before the woman comes out and explains her side of the story. Hopefully, before that happens, she takes a moment to do a deep hot oil conditioning treatment on her luscious locks and washes her dirty jeans which looks like they have had a rough couple of nights at the Greyhound bus station.

People, if you are going to freak the fuck out on a service worker in a public place, please know that someone is going to film it and the world will know about your behavior. Before you lose it and run the risk of being the next viral sensation, take a deep breath and really consider if it’s all worth it. It’s just a Meatball Marinara Sub. I get it, they are delicious. But sometime restaurants run out of food and all you can do is accept that fact and keep on living your life.

12 thoughts on “Woman Goes Ballistic For Meatball Marinara Sub

  1. Sarah

    As someone who worked at subway before… This is a norm for people…
    I also used to have a guy who had full on meltdowns if someone cut his sandwich in half. And he would want very specific cookies….etc.
    He was just an asshole but whatever.

  2. TheMomos

    Whaaaaaat?? No one in that long line stepped up to this woman? I would have lost my shit standing in line behind some crazy lot lizard broad berating that poor guy! Might have ended up getting assaulted but, what the hell, video evidence and the cunt said something about living upstairs so I’m sure she wouldn’t be too hard to find; it would have been worth it.

    1. Carolyn

      THANK YOU!!!! This!!!! I can’t believe no one in line said something – standing up for retail and restaurant workers is my favorite sport! Usually the employee can’t tell the customer what they think of him or her without it costing them money or even their job … but I can. And I do. It’s cathartic for anyone who has ever worked the trenches of customer service or just hates bullies in general.

    1. James

      I don’t think that’s a lady butt, no hourglass figure either. Wonder what state this happened in, this person is clearly on something.

  3. trippmadam

    I imagine this lady, living in GDR/East Germany in the 1980ies. She’d have had a heart attack on her first shopping trip.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *