Woman Insulted and Hurt by a Pizza

14.ilerde.yakalanmaPeople make mistakes. Some of those people who make mistakes work in restaurants. Therefore, sometimes restaurants make mistakes. Are we not allowed to be human beings who occasionally drop the ball? Customers should not expect that every restaurant worker is a robot or a perfectly-tuned machine that can give the exact same experience over and over again, yet that is what many customers do expect. And it’s not fair. A woman named Monica has been “insulted and hurt” by a pizza and it is my responsibility to explain to her why she needs to chill the fuck out.

Short story: she loved Marco’s Pizza, had been ordering there at least once a week for months, sang its praises to everyone she knew until one day it went less than perfect and now they are pretty much dead to her. Yes, after ordering her free pizza as part of a reward program, it was not up to her usual expectations and she wrote a bad review. When the restaurant offered to make it up to her with a free meal, she refused and will never, ever return!

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Here is what I don’t get, Monica. If you truly ordered there at least once a week for a few months, that’s a lot of pizza. Let’s define “a few months” as five months and “at least once a week” as six times a month. That totals 30 pizzas that were all excellent. One time you order a pizza, and it arrives with “hardly any cheese and little sauce.” Because of one bad experience out of 30, you are ready to give them a 1-star review and and never go back? Why? And when they explicitly apologized and wanted to make up for their error, you will have none of it? Monica, don’t be a martyr. You’re not Joan of Arc from France being tried for heresy. You’re fucking Monica from Richmond, Virginia and you’re “insulted” by a not enough cheese on a freakin’ pizza. If you think Marco’s intentionally left cheese off the pizza and then let it get cold just to spite the fact that you were getting it for free, I think you’re wrong. That makes you sound like a conspiracy theorist who believes that NASA faked the moon landings, Elvis Presely is still alive and that Roswell, New Mexico should have a TGI Fridays. Restaurant owners are not out to get you and sabotage your one free pizza. What is much more likely is that an employee had an off night and made a mistake and it happened to affect you. I would think that after exceeding your expectations for so many months that you would be willing to accept the fact that accidents happen. Some people will look for any reason to give a shitty review.

Flash forward fifty years to Monica at a retirement home:

“2016 was such a trying time. Our country was divided as we tried to decide who our next president would be, racial tension was at an all-time high, extreme terrorism was a global issue and I once got a pizza that didn’t have enough cheese on it…”


8 thoughts on “Woman Insulted and Hurt by a Pizza

    1. JunkyMonkey

      Yup, that’s what I took away from her last sentence, “the sincere apology was enough” and wasn’t going to need a credit…

    1. dead_elvis

      Because then she wouldn’t have justification to bitch & whine unreasonably in a public forum!

      At least she accepted their apology, if not the extra $10 credit. (Maybe she’s worried that cashing it in would result in another insulting & hurtfully topped pizza, and a woman can only be expected to take so much pizza abuse from one restaurant.)

  1. Mellie

    So yesterday my family and I were at was is probably THE best place to eat breakfast in Bloomington, Indiana and the guy in the booth across the way was complaining very loudly to the waitress that his eggs were runny, he went on and on and on about his runny eggs. The waitress offered to bring another serving and he declined stating in such a philosophical tone that I felt as if I were sitting next to Aristotle himself, “you know, once you even lay eyes on runny eggs, you just can’t go there again, I mean, you just can’t, I just cannot do it” Of course his entire meal was paid for, including his $5 specialty coffee that his fat face slurped down. He went on to tell the waitress that he eats there all the time and that this was just one black mark and he definitely wouldn’t put it out there on Yelp or Trip Advisor. I went on there this morning to check and make sure because if he had I was going to blister his f#$king a$$ over it if he did… I just absolutely hate people sometimes. Everyone screws up, does every screw up have to be made public every g-damn time?!

  2. Chris Higgett

    Last year I was working in a restaurant renowned for its excellent service in my home town of Middlesbrough (UK), we received a trip advisor review of 1 star off a lady who said all this:

    Excellent service, waiter was very attentive, food was lovely, arrived in good time, however the cappuccino I ordered was luke warm, after complaining to the manager (me) they offered to change my coffee but the damage has already been done. I will never go back to this restaurant again …

    That wasn’t a direct quote but pretty much word for word. 1 star for a coffee. That affects restaurants ratings and reputations. Idiot.

  3. Madeline

    I agree with you on 99% of posts, but really after reading her included follow up comment I don’t think she should be here. It looks like she way overreacted, sure, but then she accepted their apology and was nice in the follow up. So yeah, a dumbass at first, but she calmed down and became a normal person againZ


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