I have never worked at McDonald’s but I can imagine being employed there is more difficult than dealing with a 17-top of Red Hat Ladies during the Early Bird Special when you’re hungover as fuck and trying to hold in the voms. Since fast-food workers wear the same polyester uniforms that we do, they get my love too. This week a woman filmed herself having an epic meltdown over the fact that she was going to have to wait two minutes to get her cookies at the drive thru window. There are so many questions that arise from this situation: who goes to the drive-thru for cookies? How long ago did that manager run out of fucks to give? Why does this girl never even look at the people she is talking to? Why is the camera in portrait mode???
When the manager gives her a taste of her own medicine and brings her own phone out to video what’s happening (Also in portrait mode! The humanity!), the girl lights up for the attention and announces that her name is Brandy Wooten and to find her on Facebook to follow her. I found her on Facebook, but I’m not going to share the link because in order to comment on her page, you have to follow her and we don’t really want to do that, do we? No. It’s enough that we all recognize her face so that if she shows up in your section you should be prepared for the following:
- An epic rant about a cookie.
- Being filmed in portrait mode.
- Bad grammar and profanity.
- Questions about raggedy ass skin care.
My favorite part of the video is when she says at the end that she will never go there again. Like that’s a threat. She cuts off the video three seconds after she says it, but I bet if she would have kept filming you would have seen the whole crew of McDonald;s bust out in some “Can You Feel a Brand New Day” choreography from The Wiz.
Brandy, good luck on your cookie quest.