I read this week that a couple in Cleveland, TN is suing a restaurant called Steak ‘n Shake as well as the waiter because they were given some hot sauce that was too spicy for their 14 year old son. After he ate it, he had a severe reaction including hives, difficulty breathing, inflammation of his digestive system, mouth and throat and several other “I’m-a-pussy” related symptoms. He is also suffering permanent damage. They drove his ass right to the hospital and and one year later they are suing for compensatory damages of $10,000 and punitive damages of $50,000.
The hot sauce was called Mega Death and it turns out that it wasn’t a product that the restaurant officially served. Either the waiter was just trying to go above and beyond by serving his guests something he thought they would like or he was just a rude ass waiter who wanted to prank these bitches. I go with the latter. The family had probably been annoying him all day by asking for stupid shit like extra ice and lemons so they could make their own lemonade. Or maybe they wanted the Chinese Chicken salad but instead of peanut dressing they wanted Ranch and instead of chicken they wanted steak. And leave off the peanuts. And no lettuce but substitute it for a baked potato. By the time the kid asked for some hot sauce for his goddamn chili, the waiter was like “yeah, I got some hot sauce for you.” I must admit I have imagined taking a crying baby’s bottle and dipping the nipple into Tabasco so I can kinda see where this waiter is coming from. Was it right of him to do it solely because he was being a prick? Absolutely not. Is it funny as yell? Absolutely yes.
Let’s look at the responsibility of the family though, shall we? If you ask for hot sauce and one comes to your table that is unfamiliar to you, maybe it would be a good idea to look at the label. This label says that it’s called Mega Death. And it has a skull hanging off of it. It says it’s hotter than 500 jalapeno peppers. That might be a clue that you don’t want to just pour it into your chili all willy nilly. But the kid did and now they want some money because their son is “permanently damaged.” By hot sauce. How is someone permanently damaged by hot sauce? And as a 14 year old, I think he should have been able to read a label himself. He’s in high school, right? I know our education system is not what it should be, but most 14 year olds can read, can’t they? And if they say he was hospitalized do they mean more than just a trip to the emergency room? The father is a pastor of a church so it would be easy to assume that he would turn the other cheek or forgive the waiter for his ways, but in this day and age it’s much easier to call 1-800-SUE-THEM. Surely when this case is settled out of court, Mr. Pastor will be donating all of his settlement to the collection plate. Uh huh. Right.
According to reports, the waiter no longer works at Steak ‘n Shake which must be a terrible blow to his ego. Working at a place called Steak ‘n Shake has got to be so fulfilling. It’s right up there with working at Houlihan’s, Pizzeria Uno’s and The Black Eyed Pea. Hopefully, this waiter will not be held responsible. They asked for hot sauce, he brought them hot sauce, case closed. Regardless of the fact that the boy’s esophagus closed up tighter than Carl Paladino’s sphincter muscle at gay pride parade, the waiter only did what he was asked to do.
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