So I have learned one of the downfalls of working in a performance space as opposed to a restaurant. On a slow day at a restaurant, you may get fewer tables and get cut early and make less money than you had hoped. In a performance room when you serve cocktails, if no one schedules a show that night, you just lose your shift. Yeah, just lose it. I get it. What singer wants to have show on January 3 when everyone blew their wads over New Year’s weekend? Nobody, that’s who. So usually there are three shows on Sunday and today there are no shows. No. Shows. No customers. No tips in my pocket. I swear to God, I looked in my wallet the other day and a moth fucking looked back at me and said “get the fuck outta my house, bitch.” So I have the day off. And I think I shall spend it cruising craigslist and looking for a new job to supplement my income. Isn’t it time I had a job that sucked really bad just so I can have lots and lots to blog about? Maybe a job at IHOP would provide me with plenty of fodder for this site. Or a couple of shifts at The Olive Garden even.
Funny story about The Olive Garden. I was with friends a few days ago (yeah, I have a couple of them) and we wanted to go have a cocktail. It was about two fucking degrees outside so the closest place was The Olive Garden on Sixth Avenue and 22nd Street. We thought it would be funny to go to the bar and have a drink there all the while making fun of the fact that we were in a fucking Olive Garden. We went to the door and it was locked. There was a security guard inside and she came up to the door and and pursed her lips, tilted her head and wagged her finger at us and then mouthed the word “closed” and walked away laughing. Oh no she din’t. Bitch, we were only going into the lame ass Olive Garden to make fun of it and all the losers who were in there. I was pretty sure I didn’t like The Olive Garden and now I know for certain. The Olive Garden sucks ass. (But I would totally work there just to write a blog about the crappiness of it.)